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Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Love and Ego

Love has no ego. PERIOD! That's all there is to it.

But what is ego? Everyone defines it differently. My definition is anything that makes you feel less than a fully enlightened Being. Sri Sri Ravi Shankar is the only one I know who has no ego and beams love in every moment. That's why I have his videos on my page. When I am confronted by challenges and confused about how to respond, I think of Sri Sri and ask myself if I am acting out of love or ego. Then I gauge my thoughts, words and actions according to his wisdom that resonates with my own heart.


To me, ego is far more than just the typical bragging, boasting or superficial attitude one puts on to protect oneself from the judgments of others. We've all been around people who flaunt their fame, fortune, intelligence, physical appearance, bravery and successes to make us look and feel inferior. And I'm sure we've all diminished others a time or two in our lives in order to feel superior in an act of self-defense. But see, that's the point! When we come from a place of love all the time, for ourselves and others, there is no need to protect and defend ourselves.

Ego is an important part of a human being's existence, especially in our formative years. It serves to protect us while we are developing a sense of Self. At the age of 21 our sense of Self should be fully developed under normal circumstances, but in most cases it isn't. In fact, I can confidently say that it's rare for anyone to have a fully developed sense of Self by the age of 21, or 41, 61 or 91! Thus, ego is always at play in our lives and love is shunted.

Everyone is crying out for love in their own way. Some slice words into their flesh with razor blades to get the attention of their parents and peers. Others lash out angrily at family, friends and loved ones. Many more drink, do drugs, smoke, fill their time with work, sports, texting or computer chatting. And even more of the world population turn their pain inwards and just get sick.

Love is the only stream of universal energy in the world. All else is a blockage to the flow of well-being. If you do not feel a joyful sense of inner peace in your life, it means you are blocking the natural flow of love from coming to you, pulsating through you and radiating from you to uplift all with whom you come in contact. Ego is the block.

Ego is in our life to protect us, so it naturally blocks us from that which we feel will do us harm. And that which we think will harm us is standing in the way of love. The only answer is to develop a mature sense of Self so that ego no longer rules our lives. This won't stop others around us from drinking, getting sick or self-mutilation by slicing their wrists, but a mature sense of Self (or full self-realization) will expand our capacity to accept others without judgment, contempt, hatred, distain, fear or tolerance. That means no matter what others are doing we can live in happiness and inner peace.

At times when we get triggered, or put in a place where we react rather than respond to the situations and people around us and the challenges confronting us, we are coming from a place of fear. This fear is usually so deeply rooted in our psyche that we don't even recognize that we're feeling fear. Fear comes from feeling threatened. Feeling threatened means we are in ego, not love, because love NEVER feels threatened. Thus, when we are in a state of love we never feel fearful or threatened. But in our society today we don't always consciously recognize when we are feeling threatened, because generally it's our insecurities, perceptions and old ways of being that are on trial.

For instance, when you are deciding whether you want to support or endorse something with your name attached, are you in a place of fear or love? If you were in a place of love you would know that we are all one and that there is no good, bad, right, wrong - there is only one stream of universal well-being and everything else is resistace and fear. This is the point of power to face your insecurities square in the face and recognize and accept that which you are resisting. It doesn't mean you have to support or attach your name to something that does not feel "right" to you; it means that addressing your resistance will open your heart and expand your capacity to love and connect with all of life. And you may see that who you at the core can never be taken away from you because of the surface adornments you choose to wear or those that are assigned to you without your consent. Titles, presitge, name, face and credentials . . . who are we trying to protect with those games we play?

Sri Sri does not resist going into war zones because he's afraid it will lower his energy levels, cause himself to take on the negativity of his surroundings, or give others the impression that he supports killing, violence, hatred and ignorance. He goes into areas of unrest to spread knowledge and bring love. Since there are so many different consciousness levels in the world the words need to be different for each group he addresses BUT THE MESSAGE IS THE SAME!

Love.

Valentine's Day is quickly approaching and it can be a very difficult day for many people. But this year I am asking you to enter the holiday in love . . . . in love with yourself, the people in your life (whether or not you are with a partner), your surroundings, and most importantly, with YOU and the true essence of who you are. This radical way of welcoming a day for cupids and chocolate hearts may present you with the opportunity to deal with resistance - yours and that of others. It may slap you in the face with some of your preconceived ideas about the way life should be, the way people are supposed to behave in your presence and the judgements and lack of acceptance you have of others and of yourself. You may come up against your ego and it may hurt, but on the other side is love. And that's the prize we're all aiming for. Yes?

The quick trick is to recognize when ego is in play or when love is reigning supreme, and in that moment listen to the message in your heart for that is the wisdom that will guide you anywhere you want to go.

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